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hv
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PostPosted: Tue Feb 26, 2008 9:51 pm    Post subject: Farting: gravity powered? Reply with quote #1   
Gravity it seems is implicated in everything from providing the motive power for HG to orienting the upward flow of thermals. It got me thinking how influential this gravity thing really is. According to the experts it is a weak force but it seems to have a bearing on every physical process I can think of? For example, farting? Seriously. Shouldn't we find it easier to fart when in the handstand position since hot gas tends to rise?

Is there any process not affected by gravity?


Last edited by hv on Tue Feb 26, 2008 10:19 pm; edited 1 time in total
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PostPosted: Tue Feb 26, 2008 9:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote #2   
if u get really small,then yes Shocked
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PostPosted: Tue Feb 26, 2008 11:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote #3   
Ok Spork. Alias " Ross McFartech"
Time for you to do your thing. Are farts a straight forward thing? Or are they backward? Stay tuned newbies.
Break out the test tube, bunsen burner, and come at us with an array of Flatuelence roflcat

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 5:02 am    Post subject: Reply with quote #4   
I'm no expert in the subject, and only try to prevent global warming.

Just say no to methane!


Last edited by UnTuckable on Wed Feb 27, 2008 6:13 am; edited 1 time in total
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Lobido
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 5:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote #5   
The real issue is whether you can fart down wind faster than the wind itself. As a subsidiary issue, are your farts traveling up or down wind when you are hang gliding and the clouds obscure your view of the ground.

I think the trick here is to build a tube to be attached to the rectum, which will color the gaseous rectal exhalations, to enable full observation. Spork, who has proven to contain a great deal of hot air, and an abundance of energy available for his exhortations, provides the perfect subject to wear the rectal tube while in flight.

We are all lucky to have such an intellectual giant in our midst to clear up any and all confusion we would otherwise suffer without his guidance. All hail the Spork, and his scientific acumen, leading us toward full knowledge about this stinking issue.

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 5:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote #6   
We all know that the gaseous expulsions are bacteria generated
and during expulsion there is a horizontal to vertical path that it takes
ultimately spreading in a thermal bloom.
Would this reaction remain the same in a complete vacuum? popcorn

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 7:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote #7   
Lobido wrote:
The real issue is whether you can fart down wind faster than the wind itself.


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CHassan
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 7:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote #8   
Let us think about the effects of altitude, or more exact, atmospheric pressure on ones flatulence.

If I launch at 7000’ MSL, and I have a sled ride averaging 300 fpm down to my 1000’ MSL landing zone.

Now figure I only made it to 1500’ MSL, where I catch a thermal and proceeded to climb back to 7000’MSL.

Now will I be more apt to experience “rectal exhalations”, on the way down, or on the way up? (Taking note that during both the decent and accent, no turbulence is encountered that would result in sphincter clenching, or self defication.)

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 9:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote #9   
We need to consult a certified rectal engineer
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 11:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote #10   
Tom.
Isn't that being just a little anal.
Pending on the anus in question Laughing Laughing

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 2:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote #11   
I have researched this subject for many moons , i have come to the conclusion that it is none other than Ass Hole Powered



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PostPosted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 2:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote #12   
proof it isn't gravity powered


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hgflyer
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 4:03 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote #13   

Link

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hv
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 27, 2008 6:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote #14   
I never thought of that Lobido, the downwind trajectory, interesting set of variables you have thrown in to the mix.

As mentioned in another thread there are vortices to consider. Since the gas leaves under considerable pressure I believe the 'donut ring' theory used to describe the shape of a thermal is applicable here. Being vortices the rotation of the fart induces low pressure at the centre. I also believe the typical satisfying feeling we experience immediately after farting is due to the vortex. As gas is vented the low pressure vortex massages the butt cheeks leading to that classic galvanic response of goose bumps and a tingling sensation, mainly due to manipulation of butt hairs as the vortexs rolls along the skin.

Without Sporks guidance so far we will just have to assume he is sitting back quietly keeping tabs on our meanderings as we stagger through the scientific conundrum of flatulence. I believe his lack of engagement so far is akin to the professorial reservations observed from master to apprentice, no comment is like an approving nod. Lets keep this in mind fellows. I am confident we are on the right track. Idea
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Lobido
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 6:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote #15   
Yes! But, can one fart without an asshole?
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 7:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote #16   
if one farts deep in the forest where no one is around, it makes no sound,

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Lobido
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 5:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote #17   
So, does that mean that farts are wind powered or poop powered? We need some asshole to do the math. This requires some in depth anal-ysis.
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hv
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 6:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote #18   
Spork... We need you to crunch some numbers.
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